TruthAboutLies101

Friendship. Supposedly a simple equation. People meet, find out they have things in common, decide to spend unlimited amounts of time together and there you have it, friends forever. Well, perhaps in Neverland, but in reality friendship is as fleeting a commodity as fuel in Zimbabwe. When one puts everything in perspective, there are too many obstacles within this equation that need to be overcome for it to be this simple. This is why when the nature of females is juxtaposed to the nature of males, the men are more likely to be able to move past these obstructions and form long lasting friendships.

It is perfectly justifiable really. Females, to be blatantly honest are too demanding. To elucidate: females are selfish, self-conscious, vain, imposing, envious and bitter. In other words, they know how to hold a grudge. First year is unfortunately full of many surprises, particularly for those who come to university with big hopes and big dreams which tend to be crushed within the first few lectures. It becomes clear that in fact just because someone smiles at you doesn’t mean they like you and your perky attitude to life is not refreshing, it’s just annoying. Another factor is ‘rez’ life. Your residence is not a home away form home, but rather the place where you sleep and keep your clothes. Females are always on guard in such cases, waiting to confront anyone who appears to be stepping in on their territory or displaying a similar fashion sense. So because I saw you, a person I don’t know, speaking to someone I know very well, you are now the enemy but also because you made no ridiculous effort to be part of my little exclusive group of friends, you have been black listed. To put it plainly, females never truly leave high school.

The male on the other hand is conveniently a less complicated species. As a man, or ‘guy’, if you happen to meet someone who shares your passion for soccer, you’re all set. His ‘feelings’ are not a concern of yours because you are trying by all means not to look gay. Your residence is not a war zone; on the contrary it is a fraternity, a brotherhood. The camaraderie found between males is unbreakable and so if your friend makes a move on your girlfriend, you do not plot his destruction through a series of evil eyes in front of his classmates. No. You merely punch him in the jaw, use a couple of profanities and then you move on. Not only do you remain friends with this person but you then go and dump your girlfriend for causing such a rift between you in the first place. First year males generally have a better chance of maintaining these friendships because there is no risk of waking up in the middle of the night with half your hair dyed green and your clothes ripped to pieces because you just happened to sit on the wrong table at lunch!

I know. This theory stems from a string of stereotypes and so cannot obviously apply to everyone in first year or in university. However, one should probably take into consideration that a stereotype does not actually create itself and therefore logically speaking, has an element of truth in it. Granted there are exceptions, that is where we find the unwavering “best friends forever” sharing a pizza in the common room in their final years; but as life shows us more often than not, ‘forever’ is only just a couple of months.