TruthAboutLies101

It was an incident in a first term Linguistics tutorial that got me up in arms. As all first years do through the entire first term, another first year and I were getting to know each other. I was so pleased to be making a new friend, not that I’d remember her name (it was the first week, where you’re hearing about 20 names a day). However, she was in my tutorial so I’d get to know her eventually. She gently shifted over towards me and kindly asked “What’s your name?” so I replied amicably “Khatija, yours?” well now quite honestly now I wouldn’t be able to pick her out from a bar of soap let alone remember her name as it was so long ago and I also changed tutorials the second week because it clashed with my newly picked up subject, Drama. A few seconds later, looking rather puzzled she shifted over again saying, “What’s your real name?”

To this day, the 4th of October 2008 I still remind myself now and then of her question, what exactly did she mean by this? Was she suggesting that I had made my name up, that this symbol that I had identified myself by for 19 years 1 month and 3 days was some sort of farce. I suppose at this point I should mention that I am a black woman, Zulu in culture and Muslim in religion (and the fact that you can be both) hence the name Khatija. I understand however that not many know the origins of names, neither do I, this was not the problem, what got me fired up was that she expected me to say an African name in order for the name to fit her idea of what qualifies as ‘real-name’ characteristics. Had I told her my African names, Nomathamsanqa and Ntableng she would have been satisfied so I left it at “that is my real name” together with a look of anger, confusion and all moulded in my oval shaped face stemming from the routes of my African and Islamic heritage.

This was the first act of ignorance, many more were to follow. This leads me to the point I want to raise. The main difference I’ve noticed between being at school and university – the ignorance. I can’t say I have a reason or possible theory as to why this is so. Unfortunately though, as I am black myself, it is sad to say that the ignorance is more prevalent amongst black people than white. White people never ask any questions, perhaps it’s because they don’t see me as trying to be a coconut. You see, my hypothesis is that people are so interested in my name because they think I’m trying to be ‘white’ by using Khatija since I do have two other African names. I am Muslim that is what I believe in and what I identify myself as. I didn’t suddenly change, I was born Muslim.

You’ll notice people gazing into the distance, taking the time to think as to how they will approach their next question. Those who make an attempt at being subtle usually start with “Not to be rude but...” or “I hope you don’t mind me asking why...” some people even have the guts to dumb themselves down and say “Does that mean your parents are Indian?” Now I don’t at all claim to be the most well-informed person in the world but...Seriously!

Just some fun facts: there happen to be around five million Muslims in Africa, approximately one million in South Africa; in fact it’s the largest religion in Africa, followed by Christianity. Basically, coming to university is a new experience, we all know that. It makes sense then that people should arrive open-minded, I’m not saying know that Khatija is an Arabic name or that there’re 5 million Muslims in Africa but don’t make stupid comments that make you look like you’ve lived in Mars, isolated from all, ever since you were born.